I Thought It Was About Time…

It’s been a while since I last posted on here, and really to be fair I’ve been stupid busy… but that’s besides the point. A lot has happened in the past months… Too much really for one post but all in all it’s been a time of ups and downs… but today was an UP!!!

I’ve been working with one of my Year 11 students’ a lot this year and really trying to help her understand that she is actually smarter than she gives herself credit for!!! LOL! No seriously this girl is one of those diamonds in the rough in my school that when you find them you nurture them and pray to god they see the light before it’s too late! Well she did at the end of last year and has been working solidly to make sure she does well in school. But she has such bad confidence issues that she sets herself up to fail before she even begins and gets all panicky during exams… poor thing, anyway today she wrote an exam for me that she’s been stressing about for weeks and she went from getting D’s to finally getting her first A!!!! and was one mark off an A Star (A Plus in Canada)… she was soooo happy she started to cry…. It was the first A she had ever received in her life in Science… It made me feel so good to know that I helped to nudge her in the right direction and as she now knows she can do well in my class hopefully this will spur her on to do even better now!!! I hope that she can keep this up because she is one of those students that you want more than anything to do well in life because they deserve it…

It just feels so good to see students do well, just that light in their eyes, it is priceless… It’s what I live for as a Teacher… well that and the weekends! LOL!  

 

Sorry for the Delay! Dylan Laine

Vacation Plans… The Long awaited post!!!

Soooo this summer hasn’t even started yet and already it seems like we are going to be busy as fuck. I’m actually really excited about it though… It will all start with a fun weekend trip to Disneyland in Paris!!! Gareth and I are taking Connor and Darien, Gareth’s Step-Son, for their first ever trip out of England (Not to mention Gareth’s)!!! Connor just got his first Passport in the post the other week and Darien got his just the other day!!! They are sooo excited about this trip it’s crazy… Connor already has the count down on and always asks how many more sleeps… Darien shows his excitement by asking questions about the trip… so far he seems most interested in the Ferry trip across the channel and is worried about getting sea sick… but I told him that once we get out onto the deck and watch England fade away in the background you quickly forget about getting sea sick and pure excitement kicks in… We head out to Disneyland on the 30th of July and we’re back around the 2nd of August. We actually ended up getting a stellar deal on the trip, which is why we jumped on it… Hotel, Passes for 4 days for 4, Breakfast and Return on the Ferry all for £800.00 with the current exchange rate that’s only $1200!!!

Next after that it’s off to Canada for the a nice 3 week vacation in good old Saskatchewan!!! hahaha…. I’m bringing Gareth home with me this summer to meet all my friends and family back home in Canada… he’s a bit nervous but he’ll be okay… This is kind of a big trip for him as he’s actually never really ever been out of England… He’s never been on a plane either!!! So his first flight while take him from London Heathrow to Ottawa, Ontario then to Saskatoon, Saskatchewan!!! We fly out on the 9th of August at 3pm and land in Saskatoon at 8pm on the 9th as well… Once we land in Saskie, I’ll be showing him the sights of Saskatoon, Outlook, Martensville, Regina, Spalding (I probably should so he can see a proper Saskatchewan village) and most likely a trip out to see Banff, Calgary and Edmonton… We are also working on a trip south to Montana and North Dakota to see a bit south of 60… hahaha…

I think I’m most excited to show him the mountains though… he’ll have never seen anything like them before and the Rockies are just awe-inspiring, they are something you never quite forget… And well I’m sure he’ll love Saskie… I mean who doesn’t… hahaha!

Anyways we leave to come back to the UK on the 30th of August most likely exhausted and beyond dead only to start work on the 3rd of September and back to the lovely posts assigned to us… Sooo like I said it should be a crazy and exciting summer of firsts!!! I can’t wait!!!

    Yours in writing,

              Dylan Laine

All life’s journey’s begin with a single step in the right direction.

 

Coming Soon…

Expect a Post Soon!!!!

Hhhhhhhhh…

FUCK OFF!!!!!!!

Moving Forward…

Sometimes when we least expect things they tend come right up and bite us in the ass! hahaha… Like just a little over 2 months ago 2 life changing events happen to me… a both within 8 hours of each other… when it rains it pours I guess!!!

One night I’m out on my first whatever with this great guy, and it just feels so right, and it goes so well that even I’m blown away by this person sitting across the table from me. I never thought I would meet someone like him… someone that makes me feel like I’m literally the only person in the world that matters and he would become someone that makes me want to be so much better than I’ve ever been before, that I want to be the best possible version of myself for him… to be accountable to someone more than myself, to start a family, to become an adult… That night I knew I was staring at my future…

12 hours later, 2 of my ‘best’ friends both dropped the bomb on me that I was no longer a person they wanted in their lives… which in turn made me realize that I no longer wanted them in my lives…

Now 2 months and a bit later… I’ve trimmed the fat and I’m in love with this guy and ready to start the next part of our lives together, I love him… and we’ve decided to move in together, some may think it’s fast but it doesn’t feel that way… they say when you know it’s right you know, and i’ve never felt this way before about someone in my life… sure i love my friends and family with all my heart but this is different, i’ve never loved like this before… the way I feel about him almost borders some Hollywood cliche but at the same time is so much more than anything i’ve ever seen or experienced… he makes me beyond happy and gives me the things in life you can’t buy and few truly get to experience… He is the one I’d love to spend the rest of my life with… and I hope with every fiber of my being that I will be one of the few lucky ones that get to find the man of their dreams and live with him ever after… and no, not the Hollywood ‘Happily Ever After’ because that implies that everything works out perfectly and they live out the rest of their days in a peaceful existence… but the ever after that comes from loving each other and working hard to be honest and truthful with each other, respecting the other even if you think they are wrong, doing things you wouldn’t do because you know that it will make them happy and in return make you happy, and working through the crap that life throws at you together…

A wise friend of mine told me not to long ago that life and love is never going to be easy all the time and sometimes you have to fight like hell to get through the hard parts… and she is right, out of anything anyone has said to me that gave me the greatest strength, because I’ve handled all the crap life has thrown at me and I know we’ll be able to handle the crap love and life throws at us more than anything in the world we love each other and we will work through anything to get our ever after.

The Best Things…

 Yesterday I spent an afternoon with Gareth’s son, Connor. To say I wasn’t worried would be a lie but I was reasonably confident that things would go along just fine… Well things went better than I even expected… I met this little man whom is just so cute and just a blast to hang out with!!! He looks just like his father which is so cute seeing them together… and he thinks I’m funny which I’m not sure why bc I’m not really that funny!!! hahaha… It was a great day and totally made me realize that I’d love to have a family… I never thought I’d want a family of my own really after all this time, but now I know one day I really do want a family… I hope I get to have that Family with Gareth… I’ve only known him a short while but it feels so right with him… not in this superficial high school drama but in this very normal natural way… I love waking up next to him in the morning, i love looking at him, and most of all I love the way he smells… I can always smell him before I see him and it makes me laugh and smile all at the same time!

I know this has to be love… I Love Him… I find myself thinking about us together and making a  life together and it just makes me so happy… and not in a you complete me kind of silly way either but just absolute serenity when I’m around him… It’s the kind of thing I have with most of my true friends but just with a few different feelings thrown in there… I can’t explain it I just know it feels right…

I’m in Love…

           -Dylan Laine

I’m Not Surprised …

Follow this link to see if you are also going to be surprised by what you find when you’re Living La Vida Loca!!!!

 

I wasn’t just for the record…

I can’t believe this is such a big deal still…

               - Dylan Laine on People’s stupidity

This Made Me Cry Tears of Joy…

:) even connor!!! He knows who you are and that daddy spends a lot of  time with you and really likes you!! And i told connor that your a very funny person and make daddy laugh lots!! You ok with that?

I’m so happy… :)

This is Helping….

OMGSOFUCKINGCUTE!!!

 

Hahaha…. This says it all…

Lily Allen - Fuck You [Official Video] (Non Censuré)
by Lily-Allen-Tv

Look inside, look inside your tiny mind
Then look a bit harder
'Cause we're so uninspired, so sick and tired
Of all the hatred you harbor
So you say it's not okay to be gay
Well, I think you're just evil
You're just some racist who can't tie my laces
Your point of view is medieval
Fuck you, fuck you very, very much
'Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch
Fuck you, fuck you very, very much
'Cause your words don't translate
And it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch
Do you get, do you get a little kick
Out of being small minded?
You want to be like your father
It's approval you're after
Well, that's not how you find it
Do you, do you really enjoy
Living a life that's so hateful?
'Cause there's a hole where your soul should be
You're losing control a bit
And it's really distasteful
Fuck you, fuck you very, very much
'Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch
Fuck you, fuck you very, very much
'Cause your words don't translate
And it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you
Fuck you
You say you think we need to go to war
Well, you're already in one
'Cause it's people like you that need to get slew
No one wants your opinion
Fuck you, fuck you very, very much
'Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch
Fuck you, fuck you very, very much
'Cause your words don't translate
And it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you

It’s been a While…

I know it’s been a while since I’ve last posted something but I finally have something to say…

 

OMFG!!!

 

Ok, it’s no surprise to many that I’m in LOVE! with this story line on One Life to Live… It’s a story about these two guys named Kyle and Oliver… It’s this great story… even for a soap which is what I thought would be it’s down fall but it is such a great a true story and doesn’t feel overly like a soap… the emotions in it are raw and caught me off guard many times and brought me to tears because I’ve felt that way before…

It starts out as Kyle and Oliver were Frat Brothers in college but had never talked since college, they run into each to each other years later, Kyle is an out gay Med Student and Oliver is now a ‘Straight’ Cop… turns out that they had a thing in college but Oliver freaked out and left Kyle… declared he was straight and tried to move on… well Kyle shows up and Oliver starts trying to up the front but it goes down after some truly great events that are heart breaking and so very real and true…

Now it goes on from there and after a while they do end up together and I won’t ruin it for you if you ever intend on watching it but it is really fucking awesome for a soap… better than anything I’ve ever seen on TV before….

Anyway the point is yesterday the writers of the One Life to Live have decided to write the characters off the show… It’s sad because they were not this typical cliché of characters they were strong and smart, they actually loved each other… it was never a story about 2 guys together it was a story about love… It was great and I’m sad that it will be over… I wish it would go on forever but I’m sure that at some point it would reach that spot were it should have been over long before and I’m glad it will go out on a high note but it was a story that helped me through many issues I had about love… even after being out for 4 years it helped me see that I could find something more, that it really was possible because for the longest time I didn’t think I was capable of finding something more… Being gay is hyped a lot about being overtly sexual and that being in a gay relationship is generally just about sex and nothing else… it was nice to see something that wasn’t about sex but instead was about love… the characters actually never had sex until they had been together for over a month or 2 and they wanted to take their time because it was about them and nothing else… it was refreshing and just what I needed as well…

It’s funny but I think I’ve finally found something more…

Here is an interview with the 2 actors that played Kyle and Oliver that was done about 2 days before they found out they were being let go… it’s a nice interview and really shows how truly amazing these guys are.

Brett Claywell & Scott Evans Interview from Michael Fairman on Vimeo.

Parting is all we know of heaven and all we need to know of hell.  ~Emily Dickinson

The View from This Side of 20

So since we’ve last spoke I’ve been busy turning the ripe old age of 26… I’m officially on the wrong side of 20! Well not really, the good side of 20 started out with me in a rough, figuring me out kind of place… which I’m so glad is over!!! Well, you know, that work is never really done but I figure the heavy lifting is out of the way… I hope… LOL!

It’s nice knowing that I’ve come this far in 5 years… Man when I think about where I was when I was 20… the people I hadn’t met yet, the things I hadn’t admitted, the fears I had yet to face down… well let’s just say it’s much better on this side… there isn’t much left that scares me any more… I’ve had a fair bit of obstacles thrown at me and I’ve survived them all… maybe a bit bruised, a bit jaded but alive and relatively whole, ready to take on the next set of challenges life has in store for me.

On the other side of my 20’s I spent a large portion of that time helping friends through there fears and yet never working on mine. I was always quick to say ‘Hey don’t be scared, it will all work out…’ Well I've finally started to take my own advise… I’m leaning into the Fear to get my Happy Whatever… My life is so wonderful in so many ways… Amazing Friends, a loving family, a job that I LOVE and HATE all at the same time… but I was always scared to open myself up to the possibility of someone else… someone to share my life with… I’m not sure if it was fear of getting hurt, fear of losing myself, fear of rejection, fear of losing sight of the things that make me me… but it all came down to fear… So I always made a million excuses as to why it wouldn’t work, and left it up to well It just won’t happen for me…

Until recently, I decided that if I wanted to have that something with someone else I had to open myself up to the fear and face it head on… So i opened myself up to the possibility… kept an eye open just in case but to save my sanity I didn’t pursue it, that would drive me crazy and make me have expectations… which I think might be the killer of all whatevers… this expectation for it to be something more than what it is… and when those expectations aren’t met we lose interest and can sometime miss what is great and maybe better than we ever thought could be  right in front of us… So I’ve decide to move forward without expectations… Know what I want and settle for nothing less, but to give it a chance to turn into something beyond any of my expectations… like so many of the great friendships in my life I entered into them with no expectations of great and unrequited love and adoration but only knowing I wanted someone I could talk to and that got me… all the rest was just icing on the cake and if my friendships have anything to show for it, well when I find that someone whom I can share a life with, well, it will be beyond any expectation I’ve ever had…

So I’m beginning my journey down the other side of my 20’s content with being me and with only one expectation… to be surprised…

Hey! Smashley! If the play was called Bong Water would you pay attention?!

                       - Razor

Don’t Stop Believing!!!

Today is one of those days I’m so over come with Happiness that it just feels so amazing to be alive! I’m finally back Teaching and I never realized how much it makes me happy until I stepped back into my classroom… It just feels so good being there and doing what I love, All those night I spent wondering if I’d ever make it again, if I’d be able to do this again, were all for not! I feel like I’ve never left… well minus the mounds of work I have to catch up on but even still I don’t care, I’m just so happy to be back and doing one of the few things in my life that brings me true Happiness…

   I love it out here, some days it’s hard to imagine leaving this place… already I feel that leaving after 3 years will feel like I’m leaving a huge part of me behind, I will miss this one day, and I’m never taking this experience for granted… the only crap bit about being out here right now is working through the debt that I’ve accumulated but even with that I’m still doing that what I love… I’m seeing the world!!! I thought it was going to be really hard without Carolyn here this year but thankfully it’s not… Lunch breaks are one of the few exceptions though, her absence is pain stakingly obvious then but I manage… I work with such a great staff that they are helping to fill that void…

I miss my friends from back home though… Especially my Jacquie, and my Robyn… My BFF mug is a constant reminder of the life I’ve left behind once again in the course of following my dreams, but it is the thing I look forward to every morning; having a cup of coffee with an old friend…

It makes me happy when I look at that mug to know that I never took the time I had with Jacquie these past couple months for granted… I cherished every moment spent with you my Jacquie, the group is my safe place when I’m having a shit day, and there just always seems to be a message from you there whenever I need one most… It’s funny how the more things change the more they stay the same… With all the changes that I’ve come back to in My English Life, it still feels like the place I’m meant to be… I wonder some days if I will ever find another place I feel this at home in… I hope I do, and I’m sure I will but it scares me how much I love this place, I wake up every morning excited for the day… even when I know I’m facing a dreadful lecture but even that doesn’t get me down… The high I get after a good day at work more than makes up for any crap day… I look forward to each day with passion and excitement because i never want this to end… I’m don’t want to ever take the blessings I have for granted… I have more than I should to be honest… But in a nut shell… I feel like me again, like I have a purpose… and it feels sooooooo good…

The only dream worth living is your own…

                          - Dylan Laine

OMG!

I’m leaving for the UK, yet again, in 36 hours!!!!!

Torn is my heart!

Everybody’s gonna love today, gonna love today, gonna love today, anyway you want to, anyway you got to, love, love, me!   - Mika

A Decade in Review…

Well it is getting to that time when we are asked to make a resolution of how we are going to change our lives for the coming year… What are we gonna do different this year to make us even better than we were before??? We are always looking to the future and always will… however at this very moment I’m going to reflect on this past decade to see how far I’ve come… and lay out some of the major moments of my life so far…

And also because this is the first decade of my life that I remember from start to finish… LOL!

2000

Wow, now that was an exciting year and contrary to popular belief no one died, well except maybe those people that got Y2K ready and bought the world’s supply of generators… sorry guys 10 years later and we’re still kicking…

The big news of this year was that I finally got my Driver’s License!!! and it only took me 3 tries as well! LOL! Long story… if you ask me I’ll tell you another time… And with that I got my FIRST CAR!!!! My brand new Pontiac Sunfire!!!! That car was the ultimate symbol of my freedom and I loved every minute I spent in that car… so many great memories were made in that car… I also got my first real job, yeah it was only at Family Pizza in Humboldt but I rocked it and it helped me prove to myself that I could succeed without my parents…

This was also the year I decided that I wanted to become a Teacher…

2001

This marked my first trip across the ocean to Europe!!! Paris and Rome!!! It was an experience that changed my life and turned me into the wondering soul that can’t wait to experience all the world has to offer… It was also this year that I met Becky, a girl that for the first time in my life made me feel that it was okay to be who I was and never expected any less from me. It was also this year that I got my first book for Christmas… it was JR Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring… it’s actually a good story as well because I hated reading with a passion, and made that very clear about 20 mins before opening the gift… so out of guilt I read the book, and fell in love with reading… it was a Christmas that changed my life… because now reading is a passion of mine…

2002

This was the year I did it! I survived High School!!! Graduated with honours and got accepted to the University of Saskatchewan, the university I had always dreamed of attending, it was a great year… I moved to the city and met so many awesome people and left behind that old town that I loathed so often… It was great to be in lectures and actually talk to people that had something to say… and this huge step in my life proved to me that I could start a new life and be happier than I ever thought possible, at the time anyway.

2003

I turned 19!!! and after a rocky start i fell into the bar scene and slowly but surely really started to come out of my shell I had hide in for so many years… I also got my first job in the city that summer, after my first year of University, at Boston Pizza, and made friends with some amazing people, that I still talk to today… I also met a girl named Tracey… she was my first real friend that made outside of a common group of friends… for me that was a big deal… and in a couple years I would find an undying friendship through Tracey…

2004

The big news of this year was my first venture out on my own, I moved out of my Dad’s place and into my own house, with roomies of course, but I was striking out on my own and I’ve never looked back. It was another one of those life altering moments when you wake up and realize that you are living on your own 2 feet. And to top it all off, I lived in the same complex as my friend Tracey, it was just awesome to say the least… It also was the year where I almost dropped out of University… but thanks to a ‘not so quiet’ discussion with my Momma I changed my mind and didn’t drop out… which was one of the best decisions of my life, it taught me to work through the hard times and never give up, because once you start quitting it can be hard to stop… It wasn’t until I finished that year that I thanked my momma for always being my mother…

2005

This year changed my life forever… It was the first time I applied to The College of Education, and was rejected… So I took this as an opportunity to grow and take some time for me… little did I know that by the end of this year I would actually find myself and an amazing friendship… and it all started happening when Tracey moved away… she went to Red Deer for school to become a Psych Nurse… Me and a good friend of Tracey’s Robyn, started hanging out and quickly became close, 4 months later she moved in with Becky and I, and she became one of my closest friends… and about 4 days later I told my friends that I was gay. It was a day that changed my life forever and I have never looked back, i look at it as the day I finally became me… the person I always was in every way… for everyone to see… it wasn’t easy but I’ve never regretted that choice… the choice to be me.

2006

I met my soul mate this year… I met my Jacquie. I’ve never felt such a connection to anyone in my entire life… someone who got me from the beginning and someone whom I got to be 100% me in everyway with, no lies, no dodged questions, just me and my Jacquie… and not to mention, our meeting became the stuff of legends and is one of the best stories of all times… It was also this year that I was accepted to the College of Education at the University of Alberta and I moved to Edmonton with Robyn and Kelli… oh yeah I also got married to Kelli that year… hahaha… it’s a good story too…

So I moved to Edmonton, and I took it as a challenge to see if I could move some place I've never been before and build a new life for myself being me, 100% me… and I did it… It was great starting over it was one of the most empowering experiences of my life at that point and I rocked it out there… I made friendships I never thought possible… and it was just me… Edmonton helped me prove to myself I was worth while, and someone capable of great things….This was also the year I became a God-Father, Payton was born that summer… on Harry Potter’s birthday no less… LOL! I don’t think Becky will ever let me live that one down… LOL!

2007

This year marked a mile stone in my life… the time I first stepped into a classroom! The first time I got to Teach!!!! It was at a small school in Red Deer, AB but it was an amazing experience that was incredibly life affirming and showed me that I had what it takes to be a Teacher… and it was in this term that I met people that would change my life, and become those life long friends from University that you carry with you forever…    This also marks the year that Facebook came into my life… LOL! enough said because by the sheer fact that I’m mentioning this here shows the obsession that I have with it… LOL!

2008

This was another huge year in my life… the year I graduated from the University of Alberta and became a Teacher… on paper… but 2 months after my graduation, I was offered a Teaching post at a little school called the Community College Whitstable, in Whitstable, Kent, England!!! A dream I had only dreamed about since I decided to become a teacher… It was one of the best days of my life when I got that phone call saying I got the post… and with it Came a move to England that showed me what it was like to live your dreams and that the reality could be so much more amazing than the dream… It was also this year that I met Carolyn, my Asian!!! She has become one of my best friends and an even greater travel partner… honestly I could not ask for more that year, it was something out of a fairy tale…

2009

And finally this year which has had it’s incredible highs and some low-ish points as well… I say low-ish only with the intention that it’s no good to dwell on the bad but see the lessons in life’s unfortunate circumstances… It was this year that I proved to myself that if you persevere and work through your problems that you can achieve greatness… I pushed myself every step of the way to over come the challenges I faced in my new surroundings and I pulled through… so well in fact that my school signed me onto a one year contract because I did such a GREAT job with my students, which was no easy feat I assure you! It was beyond anything and as much as I could have quit all those days and said I don’t need this, I didn’t and it paid off in rewards I never thought possible…. this also marked the year where I was deported from England because of a slight Visa Issue… LOL! It was a slight inconvenience more than anything but so much good came from it that I don’t even care any more to be honest because I got my new Visa and I’m about to start it all over again!!!!! And this time maybe, just maybe a little wiser…

So many good things happened this year that I can’t even put into words… the amazing trips, the personal victories and accomplishments… it has been a year to remember…

So…. 2010…

So what am I going to do to make 2010 the best start to a new decade in my life??? Well, as I was doing this I’ve noticed that all the big mile stones in my life came from me pursuing my dreams, taking chances, and being me… so my resolution for 2010 is what my resolution has been every year… to continue to be me because at the end of the year I’m still only me but with just a few more awesome stories to tell because i wasn’t afraid to be me….

And I think Steve Carell said it best in ‘Dan in Real Life’, ‘Plan to be Surprised…’